• Nikki Vergakes

Being Nicer to Myself & A Force to be Reckoned With

I've written a pretty lengthy poem called, "Anatomy of Anxiety". It delves deep into my experience with anxiety, how it makes me feel and my hopes for living a fruitful life after finally facing it after many years. I'll be publishing it verse by verse over the next few weeks on this blog. Below is the next two parts - "Being Nicer to Myself & A Force to be Reckoned With".

Anatomy of Anxiety Table of Contents:

1. Mindfulness

2. Me Against the World

3. The to-do List & Existentialism

4. Being nicer to Myself & A Force to be Reckoned With

Theres, of course, a lot that this doesn't cover. If you every want to talk more about your relationship with anxiety, please e-mail me.

Being nicer to myself

When did I last relish in my own awesomess?

When did I last let myself call me “awesome”?

You can’t tell me because all you’ve called me is awful.

Why can’t I accept a compliment?

Have you ever paid me a compliment?

No, you’ve just made digging comments.

If you’ve got so much to say, why don’t you just

Throw a concert

Better yet a pity party.

You’ll be the one throwing pity parties soon,

I’ll be throwing the real ones.

You’re not invited and neither are your friends

Because I gotta look out for myself in the end

And I’m hoping I can bring this abusive relationship to an end.

A force to be reckoned with

Can’t I just acknowledge that I’m a force to be reckoned with?

Rather than accept my flaws, can’t I accept my skills?

My accomplishments? My awesomeness?

Life is more than the to do list.

I am more than the to-do list.

I am more than my accomplishments.

I am capable of enjoying little moments again.

I am capable of enjoying life again.